My Take On The Rules

Because there was another bandwagon to jump on

Pull Up A Chair is a weekly newsletter containing all the things I’d like to be chatting about if we could hang out together in real life.

• 🥤 Nalgene water bottle. After more than two years of use, I finally lost my Glossier Nalgene bottle last month - and went straight onto WildBound to replace it. 500ml, narrow-mouth - the perfect water bottle. In true ‘emotional support water bottle’ style, I have covered it in stickers. It was especially funny to bump into a colleague in the gym this week, who had the same bottle in the larger size. 

• 📕 Darling by India Knight. We read The Pursuit of Love in my book club and I loved it - but I think I might have enjoyed this updated take even more. Completely delightful. Would highly recommend if you love I Capture The Castle, Under A Dancing Star, Eva Ibbotson, Mrs Harris Goes To Paris, The Women in Black, or other books in that sort of bucket (All links in this paragraph are affiliate links to Bookshop.org - AD). 

• 🥬 Garlicky spring greens. I followed the ‘Pecorino polenta with garlicky kale’ recipe in the fabulous new Smitten Kitchen book, Smitten Kitchen Keepers (affiliate link - AD), inasmuch as I took the flavour combination and ran with it. I ended up with a huge pile of spring greens sautéed with garlic, which I ate first on polenta and showered in grated pecorino, per Deb Perelman’s recipe, and then with toast, a fried egg, and hot sauce. 

One thing about me is that I will always jump on a bandwagon. If you haven’t seen The Cut’s list of ‘rules for modern etiquette’, and all the chat about it online, this week - let me be the one to share both the original list and some of the delightful takes on it: Kate McKean, Arwa Mahdawi, Rebecca Makkai.

So, my rules:

1. You must always have the chocolate on top of a cappuccino. Bonus points for eating it with a spoon. (One morning this week I heard a barista confirm “No chocolate on the skinny cappuccino?” and honestly that might be the saddest thing I heard all day). 

2. When you’re feeling powerless about bad things happening in the world, donate money (even a small amount helps) to a charity working in that area. This week I’ve given to the Disasters Emergency Committee and White Ribbon UK. Related: Cash, not stuff. 

3. If in doubt about spelling, phrasing, or semantics, check the Guardian Style Guide, which they’ve kindly made available for free online. 

4. It’s never too late to send a text wishing someone a happy birthday or letting them know you’re thinking of them at a difficult time. Belated good wishes are better than no wishes at all. 

5. The best workout is the one you enjoy. Rest days (As Emily of EmKFit calls them, potato days) are essential. 

6. Mayonnaise on chips, ketchup on a breakfast roll. Brown sauce should be consumed only when mixed into chippie sauce and on fish & chips. 

7. If you see someone getting harassed out in public, and if you can intervene safely, do so. If you can’t, but you can keep an eye on what’s happening, do that. 

8. When you’re not enjoying a book, put it down. A ‘did not finish’ is completely acceptable. I tend to give it a few chapters - or 100 pages minus my age - to ‘grip’ me, and then move on. 

9. Never comment on anything about a person’s appearance they haven’t decided that morning or couldn’t fix in 15 seconds. Great hairdo? Crumbs on their shirt? Go ahead. Weird dye job? Toothpaste on their collar? Keep schtum. (I know I heard this one from someone else, but I can’t remember where!). 

10. The best seats on the bus are: at the front of the top deck, the ‘Popemobile’ seat opposite the driver, or the extra legroom seat next to the fire exit. 

11. Brown eyeliner is under-appreciated; all eyeliner and eyebrow pencils should be ‘twist up’ so you don’t have to keep track of a sharpener. My favourite: Rimmel. 

I’d love to hear your rules!

Speak soon,

Lily